"It’s a fast-paced, gut-busting, customer-service satire set in a dystopian world — our dystopian world, really — where all the old civics lessons have been bent, folded and mutilated: Once we were citizens; but now we’re all just customers."
Marty Rosen, Louisville Eccentric Observer

" a 70-minute piece of highly entertaining Brechtian agitprop is a neat piece of satire that deserves additional productions."
Chuck Lavazzi, Stage Left

“A smart and nimble script that meshes pointed satire and call-to-arms populism with surprising ease, The Veri**on Play wins the hearts and minds of the audience with unashamed low-brow humor and shoot-the-moon energy.”
Keith Waits

"Kron's writing is quick and smart and filled with attention-getting cultural references."
Elizabeth Kramer
Courier Journal

"…had me laughing loud enough to annoy the gentleman next to me."
Peter Clark


When Jenni called customer service all she wanted was to fix a minor problem with her cell phone bill. Instead she was sucked into a vortex of unimaginable horror.

Now she wants revenge - or to get her cell phone service turned back on. Part thriller, part screwball comedy, part based on actual events that have undoubtedly happened to YOU.


A small pool of light comes up on JENNI.

JENNI. Life changes on a dime, doesn’t it? (She drifts off into a reverie,then--)I’m sorry... I lost my train of thought. Uhh... (Remembers the dime she’s holding in her hand) Oh. Dime.

They say in the old days you could make a phone call with a dime. Can that really be true? Was it ever that simple? Were there really little booths on corners where you could just slip a dime into the jingling slot and...

(sliding into an imaginary conversation) Hi. I’m good, how are you? Oh, I don’t know, what do you want to do tonight? Oh, that sounds fun. That sounds like so much... Funny, the things we take for granted until oneday a little billing problem with Ferizon rips your life to shreds and everything you thought you knew about yourself and your world and everything just... just...

(She takes her cell phone out of her pocket and looks at it) How can something so little cause so much pain? It’s not supposed to be that way. It comes with a PLAN! I thought itwas a plan to make my life easier and better--but I waswrong! Oh my god, I was so wrong! (collapsing) Oh why??? Why can’t it all go back to the way it was???



Listen to the Story on NPR's All Things Considered


Playscripts as part of the anthology Humana Festival 2012: The Complete Plays.


Contact Patrick Herold at ICM.